Officially Thirty-Something

This month I turned the big 3-1. The best thing about getting older (besides the alternative) is that I share this birthday month with four other June babies; wonderful, special people who have been very influential in my life: Elaine, Crystal, Rusty, and Kim.

I met Elaine the summer I turned 22, a naive and impressionable new Auburn grad starting my first job. Elaine was a nurse in the child and adolescent psychiatric unit that became my first bullet point on my resume. But because of Elaine, and other wise and caring co-workers, I got so much more from the three years I worked as a mental health associate. The job itself taught me so much about myself; Elaine taught me about the kind of person I want to be. Always calm under stress (and believe me, in a locked psychiatric unit, there was stress) she was an example of how to handle life’s changes, and the struggles of parenthood and marriage, with grace and patience. She was there to guide me and cheer me on through the biggest milestones of my life, including planning a wedding and embarking on a marriage as a clueless 24 year old. All the while offering her support and wisdom. Thank you, Elaine, for staying up all night making silk roses for my wedding, listening to me agonize over whether he was going to ever pop the question, and hosting me for American Idol when I didn’t have cable. And thank you for showing me what it means to be steadfast; a woman who fulfills many roles, and gives so much to those around her.

Crystal and I shared a boyfriend in the fifth grade. Perhaps that’s why we didn’t really hit it off until junior high, when our parents decided to enroll us in a Taekwondo class along with my best friend Michelle and Crystal’s BFF, Kristi. Before long we were skipping class to eat Dairy Queen in our karate uniforms and by high school were passing constant notes about boys and weekend plans. (I don’t know how I have a high school diploma, much less doctorate, btw.) Crystal and I dated the same boys, but what really bonded us for life was the loss of Kristi in a tragic car accident at the end of our freshman year. We had never known loss before; and at the tender age of 15 we only had each other and mutual friends to make sense out of it. I know neither of us can have a big life experience without thinking about what if Kristi hadn’t taken her mother’s car out that night. It is amazing to see someone you knew as a shy kid become a successful career person, a wife, and a mother. Without a doubt she will be a success at whatever she does. Thank you so much for letting me be a part of your life, Crystal, despite the distance between us. I can’t wait to see you soon!


Oh, Rusty, what can I say about him! For his last birthday, I sent him a list of all the things I love about him. I can’t imagine anyone NOT loving this man, and I have had the joy of knowing him since kindergarten! Rusty and I grew up a block away from each other, and many pre-driver’s license nights were spend carousing the neighborhood by moonlight, toilet-papering houses, smoking cigarettes (okay, Mom, I admit it) or just feeling rebellious. Like another big brother, I looked to Rusty for approval on the boys I dated, the clothes I wore (so maybe on SOME level I knew he was gay), and of course my soccer skills As hopeless as I was on the soccer field, he was the first to cheer me on. Along with Tommy and Eliza, our little neighborhood clan took on the world as we knew it. What would I give to go back to the creek and revisit one of those careless summer days. Rusty and I celebrated our high school and college graduations together; he spoke at my wedding and I hope to speak at his (or maybe just stand beside him in a badass couture gown, courtesy of Celestino). I love you Rusty, and love how our friendship never feels worn out or outgrown, but worn-in like a favorite t-shirt I’ll never throw out.


Last but not least, Kim was introduced into our circle of friends when she was one of my BFF’s potluck suitemate their freshmen year at Auburn. At first Kim was the quiet one, the laid-back almost pushover of the group. And then she blossomed into anything but. We lived together for two years in college and despite being exactly one year and a day apart, Kim and I couldn’t be more opposite. Despite fistfights from pushing each other buttons, we always had each other’s backs. Kim has lots of qualities I wish I had (first of all, she has the most awesome hair); her lack of inhibition, her athleticism, her generosity to a fault. Even though we don’t talk much, I know she still has my back. I certainly have hers. Happy birthday, my friend!